What is Burnout and How to Recover From Emotional Exhaustion?
In our fast-paced world, the pressure to achieve more with less often leads to the very real effects of burnout.
From careers, supporting children, trying to pursue hobbies, staying on top of tasks, supporting aging parents, trying to stay connected to friends and trying to take care of our health – it is a lot, and it is easy to get overwhelmed.
Most of the time when we hit emotional exhaustion, we are able to find (or better yet demand) reprieve. We pull off a good vacation or weekend getaway and are able to rest, recover and recharge so that we can jump back into our crazy lives.
However, sometimes we may get stuck in a state of being overwhelmed for too long and this can result in you experiencing the insidious effects of burnout.
Burnout is more than just feeling a bit stressed out. It is a state of exhaustion that can result in you feeling disconnected from your friends, family, interests and passions. If left unaddressed, it can snowball and impact your ability to focus, be present in your lives and show up fully in roles as professionals, students, parents, and caregivers.
Given the potential impact burnout can have on our lives and mental health, we decided to do a deeper dive on this topic. In this post, we will cover what is burnout and emotional exhaustion, what causes it, steps that you can take to prevent it and what you can do to overcome it.
So, What is Burnout?
Burnout is a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by prolonged stress also known as toxic stress – a related but distinct concept from burnout (you can check out our post on toxic stress if you are interested in learning more).
Burnout is often characterized by three core experiences or symptoms — Emotional Exhaustion, Depersonalization or Cynicism, Reduced Personal Accomplishment. This is following a well-established model of burnout which can be assessed using the Maslach Burnout Inventory.
You can think of these experiences or symptoms as being the brain's warning signs that our systems are overloaded and our body and mind are starting to shut down to conserve energy.
You do not want to ignore these experiences, as failing to attend to these may result in an escalation of symptoms including the development of more serious mental health issues.
What are the three clusters of symptoms of burnout that you should be watching out for?
Emotional Exhaustion: This is a hallmark feature of burnout. It's not just feeling tired after a long day; it's a pervasive experience of being drained, depleted, and having no energy left to give others. This is where you go to bed feeling exhausted and wake up feeling the same. Tasks that were once manageable now feel insurmountable. This exhaustion can manifest as a persistent feeling of dread about work or daily responsibilities, a lack of enthusiasm for activities you used to enjoy, and a general sense of being "used up" or that the tank is always empty.
Depersonalization or Cynicism: This is when you start to feel detached, negative, or pessimistic about your job, colleagues, family, or even life in general. You might see others as problems instead of people, you feel irritable, or may even struggle to feel joy. This emotional numbness can be a defense mechanism, a way for your brain to cope with overwhelming demands of life – a way of detaching; but if this detached state persists, it can lead to isolation and disconnection which can further fuel exhaustion and burnout.
Reduced Personal Accomplishment: This is when you put in effort but feel like you're not making a difference or achieving your goals. You might start to question your abilities and feel less confident, which can lead to a sense of futility. Projects that once felt rewarding feel pointless. Your self-confidence gets shaken and this can lead you to make more mistakes, be less productive and feel worse about yourself.
Experiencing any of these symptoms isn't a sign of weakness or something to just "power through." You can think of these symptoms as being the smoke alarm. It's your body and mind alerting you that a change is needed.
What Exactly Causes Burnout?
Although stress is an important ingredient, it isn’t the sole culprit of burnout.
Each of us will have different risk factors for burnout depending on the coping mechanisms we use to manage stress. Aspects of our personality can also play a role.
Let's face it, some of us are a bit more neurotic than others, and this can increase or decrease the risk of burn out.
However, we don’t want to get caught in blaming the person for burnout, and there are a number of systemic or societal factors which are associated with higher risk of emotional exhaustion.
In fact, a large survey done by the Boston Consulting Group found that nearly 50% of workers from a variety of western countries reported that they were struggling with burnout, and cultures that are more individualistic and career focused tend to demonstrate higher rates of it.
What are these systemic factors of burnout? Well, most that we are going to discuss are work related, as these tend to be the most studied; but caregiver burnout is very real, and one that can be brought on by excessive demands and duties caring for others.
Workload and Demands:
Excessive Demands: I think we can all relate to being asked to do more with less. We can get caught in a persistent cycle of being asked to do more than is realistically possible within a given timeframe. This can include taking on multiple projects, managing a large team, or dealing with an overwhelming workload.
Long Hours: Regularly working beyond standard hours, sacrificing personal time and sleep. The "always-on" culture, fueled by technology, or a boss or client that cannot seem to grasp that sending stressful emails at 11:00PM blurs the lines between work and home, making it difficult to disconnect and recharge.
Unrealistic Expectations: Both from employers and self-imposed. Believing you must constantly perform at peak levels, or that you can single-handedly solve all problems. For those of us that resonate with the “Type A” personality, or the perfectionists, this can be a very real source of burn out.
Lack of Resources: Not having the necessary tools, support staff, or training to effectively complete tasks, leading to increased effort and frustration. Think of the time that your boss cut a team member and instead of rehiring, the roles and responsibilities get reassigned to members of the existing team.
Lack of Control:
Limited Autonomy: Feeling like you have little say over your work, schedule, decision-making processes, or how tasks are performed. This can be particularly frustrating for individuals who are highly skilled and capable but are being micromanaged.
Unpredictability: Constant changes in priorities, projects, or leadership without clear communication or explanation, leading to a sense of instability.
Lack of Influence: Feeling that your opinions and contributions are not valued or considered in important decisions, leading to disengagement. Surely, we have all been on a team where our voice is not considered or respected, and the decisions that are being made are from those without any real experience of doing the actual work.
Insufficient Reward:
Lack of Recognition: Not receiving adequate appreciation, praise, or acknowledgment for hard work and achievements. This can be both formal (promotions, bonuses) and informal (verbal praise, positive feedback).
Inadequate Compensation: Feeling that your salary or benefits do not reflect the effort you put in or the value you bring to the organization.
Lack of Growth Opportunities: Feeling stuck in a role with no clear path for professional development or advancement, leading to stagnation and demotivation.
Breakdown of Community:
Social Isolation: Feeling disconnected from colleagues, supervisors, or the broader team. This can be exacerbated by remote work or highly competitive environments.
Lack of Support: Not having a supportive network at work to share challenges, celebrate successes, or seek advice.
Conflict and Poor Relationships: Experiencing ongoing interpersonal conflicts, bullying, or a toxic work environment that drains emotional energy.
Conflicting Values:
Mismatch with Personal Values: A significant discrepancy between your personal ethics, beliefs, and what is expected of you in your role or by your organization. For example, being asked to compromise your integrity or engage in practices you disagree with morally.
Ethical Dilemmas: Regularly facing situations where you must choose between what you believe is right and what is required, leading to moral distress.
Lack of Meaning: Feeling that your work lacks purpose or does not contribute to something meaningful, which can be particularly draining for those who seek intrinsic satisfaction from their work.
Work-Life Imbalance:
Blurred Boundaries: The inability to separate work from personal life, leading to a constant state of being "on." This is often fueled by technology, where emails and notifications follow you home.
Neglecting Personal Needs: Sacrificing hobbies, social activities, family time, and self-care in favor of work, leading to a depletion of personal resources.
Caregiving Responsibilities: The added stress of caring for children, elderly parents, or other dependents, which can significantly increase the demands on time and energy, especially when combined with work responsibilities.
Personality Traits and Coping Styles:
As we reviewed, certain traits can make individuals more susceptible to burnout and these include:
Perfectionism: The relentless pursuit of flawless results, leading to excessive self-criticism and an inability to feel satisfied.
High Sense of Responsibility: Feeling personally accountable for everything, even things outside of your control.
Tendency to Overcommit: Difficulty saying "no" and taking on more than you can handle.
External Locus of Control: Believing that external forces control your life, leading to a sense of helplessness in stressful situations.
Avoidant Coping: Suppressing emotions or avoiding problems rather than addressing them directly.
Addressing Burnout: Proactive Steps You Can Take to Improve Your Emotional Well-being
When it comes to mental health, we are big fans of the saying that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, and proactively managing stress can reduce your risk of burnout.
In keeping with this, we have named helpful steps you can take right now to protect or reduce symptoms of burnout and reduce the effects of toxic stress.
Set and Enforce Boundaries: Define clear working hours by establishing a start and end time for your workday and sticking to them, avoiding checking emails or working outside these hours.
Learn to say "No" by declining additional tasks or commitments when your plate is full, understanding your capacity and communicating it to others.
Create physical boundaries by designating a specific workspace if working from home and "leaving" it at the end of the day, avoiding working from your bedroom or other spaces where you relax.
Take Regular Breaks. Step away from your work throughout the day, even if it's just for a few minutes. Stretch, walk around, or look out a window. Take a lunch break away from your desk. Use this time to eat mindfully and disconnect. Use your vacation days (and sick days)!
Prioritize Self-Care as Non-Negotiable: Self-care isn't a luxury; it's a necessity for sustained well-being. Engaging in regular exercise that you enjoy it is a powerful stress reliever and mood booster, even a brisk walk can make a difference.
Practice mindfulness exercises to stay present and reduce rumination. Apps like Calm or Headspace can guide you through this. Dedicate time to activities that bring you joy and a sense of flow, completely unrelated to work, such as reading, painting, gardening, or playing music, anything that recharges your battery.
Fuel your body with nutritious foods, avoiding reliance on excessive caffeine or sugar, which can lead to energy crashes.
Delegate and Ask for Help: Don't hesitate to ask for assistance from peers or loved ones when you're overwhelmed. If your workload is consistently unmanageable, try to have an open and honest conversation with your manager and seek solutions.
Cultivate a Strong Support System: Nurture your relationships with loved ones who can offer emotional support, a listening ear, and a fresh perspective. Try to connect with mentors who can provide you with guidance, advice, and act as a sounding board for your professional challenges. Engage with peers in your industry. Sharing experiences can reduce feelings of isolation.
Find Meaning and Purpose in Your Work: Reconnect with your "why" by reminding yourself of the positive impact your work has, even if it's small, and focusing on aspects that align with your values.
Seek growth opportunities by looking for ways to learn new skills, take on new challenges, or contribute to projects that excite you. If necessary, re-evaluate your current role if it consistently feels devoid of meaning and purpose, and explore other opportunities that may better suit you.
Prioritize Quality Sleep: Good sleep matters a lot when it comes to our mental health and managing burnout. Try to get 7 - 9 hours of sleep per night. Go to bed and wake up around the same time each day, even on weekends. Wind down before bed with activities like reading, a warm bath, or gentle stretching. Avoid screens for at least an hour before sleep if you can. Ensure your bedroom is dark, quiet, and cool.
If sleeplessness is a persistent problem for you, we’ve got you covered and have a full post on this very issue. Feel free to check it out here for more tips and tricks on getting a better night's rest.
If you're already experiencing burnout, it is important to tackle it head-on and the steps we have outlined above for prevention can also be helpful in alleviating emotional exhaustion.
Burnout - A Sign to Burn it Down?
Sometimes burnout is a sign that something isn’t working in our life, and applying the strategies outlined above can help. However, in some cases, these will feel like a band aid, and it is important to consider if you need to walk away from a toxic boss, relationship, or commitment.
To be clear, we are not talking about burning down your life, but sometimes burnout can be a sign that we are in situations, relationships, jobs, and arrangements that just don’t work for us.
We know firsthand that there are times when our burnout is caused by a toxic situation. The important thing is to ensure that you are not making an impulsive decision, and using natural supports, taking a break, and engaging in self-care can be a good place to start before making any big changes.
Looking for Help for Burnout and Emotional Exhaustion?
Burnout is a serious issue that you shouldn’t ignore. It can have an effect on your health, relationships, and overall quality of life. It doesn’t have to be your permanent state and life is too short leave these symptoms unaddressed.
By understanding the causes of emotional exhaustion, taking proactive steps to prevent its onset, and implementing strategies for recovery, you can regain your emotional wellness, your energy, your passion, and rebuild a sense of wellness.
Your health and wellbeing are among your most important assets – remember to treat them as such.
If you are struggling with burnout or emotional exhaustion, reach out for support. You deserve it. Burnout is not an indication of weakness, but it is a sign that you need to make some changes and meeting with a therapist can help. It is better to start tackling it head on rather than waiting until the wheels fall off.
If you are looking for professional support and are located in Calgary or Alberta, we offer specialized services for overcoming burnout and emotional exhaustion. Reach out for a free consultation today.
